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Siamo da Ikea. Il capretto è già abbastanza incavolato perchè si avvicina l'ora della pappa e non sopporta di essere seduto nell'ovetto. La mogliettina trottola attorno senza capire bene cosa vuole e soprattutto perchè vuole. Maritozzo si è arreso all'inconcludenza della consorte e ripete ad intervalli regolari allora, hai deciso? allora, hai deciso? allora, hai deciso?
In tutto questo, ci si materializza davanti agli occhi Gioacchino: praticamente un anno che non lo vediamo, lo ritroviamo ammogliato e incinto. Non per niente, si trova con una lista ad Ikea-dei-piccoli.
Lui: Ehi, come state?
Noi: Bene. E tu? Tante novità nell'aria, eh?
Lei: Eh, sì. E' una bimba e nascerà ad Agosto.
Noi: Congratulazioni. E' una bella avventura!
Lei: E il vostro bimbo? Come si chiama?
Noi: Andreas.
Lui: Ah, finalmente un nome diverso. Tutti i maschietti che nascono vengono chiamati Luca, ultimamente.
Lei: Anche noi avevamo pensato a Luca se fosse stato un maschio. Invece, è femmina.
Lui: Sì, ma Luca ormai lo scelgono tutti. Quindi, noi avevamo scelto di chiamarlo Luca con d u e C. L u c c a, come la città italiana. Bello, no?
Noi: … Ehm, sì. Lucca è una bella città in effetti.
Lui: Eh, invece, è una bimba. Quindi, niente Lucca. Peccato. Sarà per il prossimo.
Noi: … … (speriamo di no, poveretto!)
Premetto che Luca è stato il primo nome a cui avevamo pensato per il capretto. Dopo 48 ore in cui le persone si rivolgevano alla mia pancia chiamandola Luca, mi è venuto a noia il nome e, insieme a maritozzo, lo abbiamo scartato. Se un giorno Andreas si lamenterà del nome che gli è capitato in sorte, gli racconterò di Lucca e di una coppia franco-polacca che si divertiva a coniugare nomi nuovi, aggiungendo C a vanvera. Spero che questo basterà a fargli fare pace col suo nome.
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